Written by me
I flew to Ibiza this week. I'm a regular rave house basement first floor DJ there, I do it once every 40 years, but this time was different. It was the first time I'd been out of the UK since the Referendum. That things had…
Saturday During the war, when he was asked what he did when he felt the need for exercise, Churchill puffed on his cigar and said: "When I feel the need for exercise, I go and lie down in a darkened room until the feeling has…
This week, a scientist at Sheffield University- announced that the iceberg that sank the Titanic was larger than a lot of people might have thought. He has calculated that it originally weighed 75 million tonnes and was more than 100,000 years old. By the time…
Willie Sutton, the famous American bank robber in the 1930s who kept robbing banks, going to jail, coming out, robbing more banks, was once greeted by the usual pack of reporters and cameramen when he left prison again. "Willie!" a reporter shouted. "Why do you…
The attack on the Cereal Killer café in the East End a few weeks ago - I assume the anti-gentrification mob attacked at breakfast time - reminded me of those 5.30am walks in the 1950s with my grandfather, from Aldgate East tube past the Whitechapel…
Do you know any 14-16- year-olds who have after-school jobs these days? When I was a teenager in the 1960s everybody had one. Health and Safety must have put a stop to them - the risks are just too great. They could be radicalised by…
Towards the end of June, I got an email inviting me to give a speech in Fiji. It took me less than a second to accept the invitation. "Did you know the JC was big in Fiji," I asked the editor. "No," he said. "I…
Everything is speeding up in the world: Usain Bolt, Chris Froome, that rocket to Pluto - it only took it nine years! Last Saturday, I took one of the new "speed" degrees they've just introduced at Cambridge. It took four hours. Halfway through my course,…
On Tuesday afternoon, I went for my annual Harley Street medical check up. I took a very small lift to the fourth floor, face to face with a very large lady in a very large hat with fruit on it: I was tempted to eat…
"You're the third Klaureen I've met this week," I said. She looked shocked. "Must be April's hot name," I told her. The first lady with the badge spelling "Klaureen", behind the counter at the Passport Office said: "Sorry, you're smile's too big," as she looked…